What are you?
A year ago I took this test and my pose was The Exaclibur. It was strange how correct this assessment was.
I took the test again today and now I’m The Colon.
Popularity: 10% [?]
While I usually identify with Einstein, I find myself, with the cold grip of winter approaching, sad to climb into such a big, cold bed.
My passionate sense of social justice and social responsibility has always contrasted oddly with my pronounced lack of need for direct contact with other human beings and human communities. – Einstein
Popularity: 6% [?]
Popularity: 13% [?]
Popularity: 7% [?]
I posted this to Baltimore’s craigslist:
HAD we but world enough, and time,
My location, Lady, would be no crime
We would sit down and think which way
To explore the world and still get paid.
Thou by Baltimore’s locals’ sides
Shouldst rubies you find: I by the tide
Of the Rhine would drink liquor
And write stories about you, on Flickr.
And you should, if you please, be fit,
Educated, smiley and full of wit.
While my love of foreign movies grows,
Yours need not, just no blockbuster shows;
Be funny, creative, and artsy, of course,
Have hipster glasses and enjoy Aqua Teen Hunger Force.
Enjoy cooking with me and singing while I play
The guitar, and not be afraid of karaoke.
Allergic to cats? I’m sorry, we’re done.
They’re my furry babies I cannot abandon.
For, Lady, you deserve eloquent romance;
I live in Europe, and am not trying to get in your pants.
I’m five-nine, one-sixty-five,
Have black hair and hazel eyes.
And yonder all before us see
Deserts of vast TCP/IP,
Where beauty shall no more be found,
Amidst emails or the empty sound
Of echoing iTunes mixtapes or calls via Skype
That long VOIP dotCom of hype,
And your quaint honor turn to dust,
On a webcam for my eyes to lust:
It will be your idea, of course,
And who am I to look a gift horse
In the mouth. And no children please
Or STDs or contagious disease.
I drink occasionally, as should you.
I enjoy working out and practicing Brazilian jujitsu.
Though when we wrestle, I won’t break arms,
Because the rear-naked choke has its charms.
Distance and time needn’t worry incessantly.
‘Cause near the end of July, I’ll be there to see
Baltimore, and then my parents in the Midwest.
And if you have Netflix, it would be the best
To exchange recommendations,
As I believe favorites are declarations
Of character. So drop me a line,
And as standard practice, your picture gets mine.
Popularity: 6% [?]
I have a Three Strike System on invitations. When someone declines three invitations, I stop inviting.
Popularity: 17% [?]
My birthday is next week, the 18th of December.
Get me the following:
1. Digital Plates
2. A team of soccer playing AIBOs and a curiously cute coach
3. Twist Together Lamps (The Chocolate Kind)
4. A Honey Pot
Popularity: 12% [?]
In my free time, I am an avid guitar player and vocalist. I am a snowboarder who just returned from the Swiss Alps. I am a writer, a reader, a cook and a wine drinker; Spanish sherry is my favorite. In my free time, I wonder what job, woman, or home is waiting beyond the horizon. I watch independent/banned films, like Ken Park; I hack my TiVo and my Xbox. In my free time, I fix my single female friends’ internet and do maintenance on their computers in exchange for home-cooked dinners and company. I daydream of being my own boss and living in a cabin with high-speed internet. I try to maintain meaningful relationships with people thousands of miles away. I think about getting a haircut and don’t when I should. I stare at my Bentley BMW maintenance book that I specially ordered so I could learn to fix my car and watch it gather dust.
In my free time, I battle laziness, doubt, uncertainty and complacency.
In my free time, I travel to foreign countries and ponder the sexiness of accents; German is a big loser. I search for a small woman to throw around the dance floor.
In my free time, I thumb through sceince journals I have no business reading. Things of evolution, cognition, psychology and social sciences.
In my free time I dream of people and living away from them.
Popularity: 6% [?]
At the moment, my life is a popularity contest and I’m ill-equipped to compete. In the past month, I have joined 1 dating website, myspace, stumbleupon and flickr and made significant changes to my friendster account. Plus, I think some girls are shocked and offended by my domain name. Shit.
We all know that girls don’t exist on teh intarweb!!!!1 , which means the majority of voters in this popularity contest are men. How can I be expected to compete with Icelandic, perfectly breasted, skilled with the camera and not skeered women like this? Well there is hope for me.
I have determined that to win this contest I must possess a few of the following:
1) Supple Boobies (In the name of medicine, I finally looked close enough to see the scars)
2) A Good Camera
3) Computer Hacking Skills
Popularity: 6% [?]
